Week Of August 29th Doggy Horoscopes
This week, dogs everywhere are going to have their sass-meters up to 11. Remember to be patient this week because sassy or not, we all love the personalities of our incredible little fluffs.
Aries: Aries dogs love you so much and need you to stop doing the thing you call “work” and pay attention to them.
Taurus: Your Taurus pup loves Taco Tuesday and this Tuesday, make sure to drop more taco meat on the floor than usual.
Gemini: This week, have a spa day for you and your Gemini doggo! Paint each other’s nails, braid each other’s hair, and lie down with cucumbers on your eyes because that helps your eye lids stay moist? Is that right?
Cancer: Your Cancer canine is pulling an Olivia Rodrigo this week. Did they put out a hit record after a nasty breakup? No, but your pup did get their driver’s license and can now drive you around town! Your dog is super impressive, just don’t let them constantly drive by the house of the poodle they used to date.
Virgo: This week when your Virgo dog is practicing yoga right alongside, just don’t worry when their downward dog is better than yours.
Libra: This week, your Libra pup is embracing all things Dark Academia by reading Faust in a cafe, wearing all black, and studying Ancient Dog Literature at Paw-ton University.
Scorpio: Do you remember that one scene from Harry Potter when Harry encounters Fluffy, the giant three-headed dog? Your Scorpio dog isn’t going to become big and grow two more heads, don’t worry, but isn’t that a cute Halloween idea?
Sagittarius: Make bath-time extra enjoyable this week for your Sagittarius pup. Put in a bath bomb that smells like lavender, give them a glass of doggy wine (peanut butter in a wine glass) and let the good times flow.
Capricorn: Did your Capricorn dog play soccer last week? If your answer was no, this week they will play! If you said yes, then they will continue to play but be, like, so much better than before! Just bending it like Beckham!
Aquarius: Your Aquarius dog just saw the new Pixar film Luca and now wants to run away to the Italian Riviera, eat vanilla gelato, and become friends with another dog who is really a sea creature turned land-dog!