Your weekly doggy Horoscopes (Sept. 13 - 19th)
This week only, dogs won’t try to chase the mailman down the street. It’s only for a week, so if you are a mailman, enjoy the best week of your life.
Aries: This is a message for your Aries pup: “Yer a Wizard “insert name of your pup here”!
Taurus: This week, your Taurus doggo is joining Oxygen’s Bad Girl’s Club and serving attitude alongside Tanisha Thomas and Mehgan James. Ohhhhhhh boy.
Gemini: Your Gemini pup is feeling left out this week. Make sure to include them in everything you do like going to the supermarket, work, and when you follow Phoebe Bridgers on her North American tour.
Cancer: Who stole the turkey sandwich from the kitchen counter? Your Cancer pup!
Leo: Your Leo pup is not a huge fan of the fan trying to keep the living room cool. Just hide it or something.
Virgo: Your Virgo puppy wants nothing more but to cuddle with you for the week. Sorry if you have stuff to do.
Libra: It’s time to give your Lira dog a new nickname. How does Honey Bunches of Oats sound? Maybe Little Debbie? I’m just spitballing here.
Scorpio: This is a sign to take your Scorpio pup to the beach this week. You never know if you need your dog to scare off a shark or pee on a jellyfish bite.
Sagittarius: No, it’s not your roommate stealing French fries off your plate. It’s your Sagittarius pup and he has a soft spot for McDonalds.
Capricorn: This week love is in the air as your Capricorn pup falls in love with the poodle from across the street. Awww. Just don’t leave them alone too long unless you want more mouths to feed.